The Daily Poop

Ahhhh, the forgotten joy of Mad Libs.

"To be, or not to boot, -- that is the boob;Whether 'tis nobler in the spork to sufferThe slings and cubits of homely fortune,Or to take geeks against a sea of nerds,And by duking end them. To die, -- to run, -- No more; and by a run to say we end The turd and the 1287 natural shocks That flesh is senator to,-- 'tis a poop comely to be wish'd. To die, --- to run,-- To run! perchance to fart! ay, there's the runt; For in that run of death what goats may come When we have ran off this smelly coil, Must give us toe...."

Love,
Poops the bard.

The only thing worse than the Latvian Menace...Telemarketers. But As usual I have solved the problem. Apparently When you tell them that the only way you will give them money is if they talk dirty to you because you are frantically masturbating, and you wouldn't have even answered the phone except that you already had the cord wrapped around your neck, they hang right up. Who woulda thunk it? Now I realize that the Franciscan Brothers need all the money they can get their hands on but come on...Timing man. Thank god for auto erotic asphixiation...

Love Poops

Thank god for days off! I have been lucky enough to spend the last two days doing almost nothing. Well other than drinking martinis, and making mix cds. Im actually still in the process of doing both. Well three things if you count the sitting here naked except for one black sock. And I suppose I can only call them martinis in that I let the giant martini glass of vokda look at a jar of olives. There's just something about drinking naked, listening to Hootie and the Blowfish Sing "goodbye girl" thank brings a smile to my face.

And I have discovered the show Coupling. Possibly my new favorite show to watch...naked. I actually laughed so hard at one point that brownie pieces shot out of my nose. And while this is not a pleasant feeling, I have found one good thing out. Now I can fart all I want and all I smell is brownies. Well I am sure thats enough disturbing imagery for you, my loyal sublects. And in the words of the immortal Greaseman...It's Martini Time

I am not to sure of politics in general...other than the Latvian Menace. And don't let the smiling broads fool you. But as I was saying I generally stay out of politics. But perhaps Websites like Senator Crapo's are costing us all a little too much money. And anyhows, no matter how much you explain how to say the name we are still going to call you craphead.

That is all.